Over and over the opener flashes in my head, keeping my eyes wide open at night as I stare at the ceiling fan. The "what-ifs" are thrown around the room with each turn of the fan, and they bounce off the walls and hit me directly in my gut while I lay half-asleep like a zombie. Questions that I don't know the answer to turn me into a mad scientist trying to figure them out. The drool drips form my mouth as I rock back and forth in my favorite wooden chair. I keep staring at the empty table like I am trying to figure out the winning word in scrabble. I can hear the talk outside my door - the bets, the who will win, opinions, cold remarks, and the positive motivation from the people in my corner. Letting the nation down is my biggest fear. The pressure is heavy, much heavier than the bar. I want to win for the kid who trains in his garage. I want to win for the unspoken for, the hidden soldiers that train just as hard or harder than I do. The kid who gets bullied, the young kid who is crying outside his math class because he is to scared to enter the room. I want to win for you, my second family, the family of the dark orchestra. The family who visits me here in a world of black buttons and white screens. You keep me going. I am glad I have you to talk to, so the least I can do is win, and bring us home the gold. Most importantly my coach, Coach Pendlay is the man I want to see smile after I win; the happiness that one smile alone would bring me is something I can't express through this key board.
Adrenaline please be in my corner. I sometimes miss my openers because I don't finish enough. The reason for this is because the pull feels so light from the adrenaline rushing through my body that I get under too early. The Arched Angel needs to be with me in my opener; I need her to guide me to victory. I keep telling myself over and over to finish like someone has a gun to my mom's head, no matter how light the super man pull is. Fucking finish Jon, and then stand the fuck up. Fight for your life and your family's life as well. Fight for the Attitude Nation. Fight and win.
I am going into Nationals like it's another training day. This is the mindset I have decided to take going into battle. There is nothing different besides the lights, the people and the stage...just lift.
I rub my hands together after I take a drink from her dark brown body, realizing that I have training soon. Its very hard to train right now, just because I am so focused on competing at nationals. I am ready now, there is no more time for training... lets get this show on the road already. Do you have this same problem? My body and mind have their shields, war paint, and swords ready for kill time, ready for gold medal time, and bar slamming in the faces of many time. The people who hate me out there are going to hate me more when I win. What a great way to give someone the middle finger. Evert time I smile it must destroy them. Every time you root for me, they must lose sleep. Good! Let's kill 'em with kindness by winning!!!
Please give me your address, I want to send OUR gold medal to every Attitude soldier all over the world. Wear it for a few days, take a picture and share it with the Nation, and then send it off to someone else. I am dead serious. I want the world to see that big gold medal. I want the haters to see it it everywhere they go. THE HATER CAN RUN, BUT HE CAN'T HIDE! Please e-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org with your name, address and phone number. When you are done wearing it for two days, then send it off to another person. I know all the Attitude soldiers can afford shipping because we are all motivated hustlers. The goal is to have the medal travel the world for one year and then back to me. Let's do this every year. Please e-mail me, please.....let's take over the world.
Now its time to train. I will do everything in my power to get you that medal. We will win. We will concur. Slam your bars and turn your AC up with the windows down during a hot day. Salute my friends. Now go lift!
Gold Medal Tour 2012 and forever