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Tuesday, February 14, 2012

The Arched Angel

The way she bends makes you want to get under her...and fast.  Her black wings open wide and her body stretches out as if she was being raised by God himself.  A sudden pause in the gym occurs, a half second pause of beauty.  A gust of wind hits the wide eyed watchers as they gaze upon her remarkable bent shaped arch.  She rises higher and higher onto her toes as her hips come through like a 3D movie.  Her shoulders are so far back that a cup could balance on her chest without spilling.  Somehow, her eyes are still staring straight ahead, even though her body would tell you different.  What a remarkable position. What a great athlete.  A site that is kind on the eye, and would make a grown man cry from the beauty she holds.  She is the Michael Jordan of weightlifting. Her finish is greater than Lance Armstrong finishing his race.  Her arch is more famous than the golden arch we know so well from our childhood.  

Her wings are now black from the hell she has been through, before weightlifting they were diamond white.  Before weightlifting she could fly, now her back hurts so she only leaves the platform for a split second. Some call this (Ali Feet), and others say imprisonment.  Every time the angel tries to fly home, the weight pulls her back down, like the Godfather trying to get out, but they keep pulling him back in. 

Yes Caleb Ward's video below shows he is Married to her, but me.........I am married WITH KIDS! ha!  Get off me Caleb.  Pause around 26 seconds.  Oh, and I almost got kicked out of this meet for "exiting from the front of the platform".  I replied, "Johnny Cash". 

A kiss and leave relationship.  How long do you kiss before unlocking lips?  This is impossible for me to answer, only you and her can figure this out.  We need her; the Attitude Nation must have her to succeed. We need her in this sport to achieve greatness. Without love she would die, I would die.  She plays the part of my step mother, beautiful eyes and a Julia Roberts smile.  Hugs that smell like new car and a laugh that dulls pain.  She misses her old life with other angles, but now she finds herself in a love web.  One day she can fly home, but not yet.  First the Nation needs to make the Olympics; we need her grace and her beauty to guide us to the “finish”.  We need her strength and her confidence to catch the bar perfectly in the pit of unsure.  Her name is the Arched Angel, and she is in all of us, even if you haven't met her yet.  She will guide you to the land of Pr's, especially for the weaker lifters who need her most.  Weak legged lifters like myself need as much torque, bend, momentum, and lever as possible.....without it we would be nobody, without her the weight would win.  She is that half second of peace in your life before you leave her all alone to venture in the land down under, called the “catch”.  You miss her so dearly, like your mother dropping you off at summer camp.  Her black wings reverse her body as she flies away, higher and higher still keeping her eyes locked onto yours.  Its not sweat, its her tears that have fallen.  This is what the audience doesn't understand.  A bond with a lift goes unseen by the judges, a love that is un judge able.  The flapping gusts of wind from her calloused wings moves the hair on your head around like a rain storm, and your eyes pierce with concentration from the harsh reminder that you must move on, you must stand up.  The Arched Angel is not the fastest, nor the strongest, but the smoothest and most talented.  Getting on your toes in the finish with 166kg takes a guardian with wings.  Someone who understands you, just as much you understand her.  Sometimes she will help you; and sometimes she is on her lunch break. 

If you haven’t seen her yet, then you are probably seeing the scare crow.  The scare crow is mean and unforgiving.  He will make you miss everything in front, and slow is his middle name.  I call him the evil V, V for vertical.  He has no idea what explosive means, he has no clue how to put on the Ali boxing gloves.  V is also very old.  He was used way back in the day when a weightlifter wasn’t allowed to have any bar body contact.  Yes the V works great for that, but the sport has changed, and the Arched Angel has arrived. 

Her elbows point back as she lies wrapped on your lap feeding you grapes.  Her lips move across your face like a water skier on glass.  Her lips were once apple red and smooth like life before weightlifting.  But the very own Weightlifting that created her, is the one killing her. The masked two faced sport has turned her lips to more of a red whine than summer apple red, and her smooth fresh silk sheet lips are now dry desert mountains, cracked and bumpy.  Forehead to forehead you gaze in each others eyes with that half smile that speaks laughter and happiness.  The hard part about this dream world relationship is the unknowing that awaits for you after the grapes are all eaten.  Will you stand tall with weight?  Or will you stand tall empty handed?

My good friend and once team mate Caleb Ward not only has a relationship with the Arched Angel, but he is damn married to her!!  Pause around 1:02  I thought he was going to do a back flip! In my opinion Caleb Ward as top 5 best technique in the world.  He takes the spot for best athlete I have ever seen up close and personal.  You can't teach his rhythm, speed, and power.  

Caleb Ward 2016


  1. Hey Jon, I just want you to know that I love your posts, especially this one, its probably my second favorite one out of all that you have written. Lifters are alright at making lifting similes, but I've never read or seen a video of one who paints a picture like you do, thanks for putting stuff like this up, and keep up the hard work.

  2. thank you jack, this means a lot to me. thank you for visiting my blog, i am glad you like it. salute. - Jon North