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Thursday, July 28, 2011

Hello friend

     Back in the jungle drunk off coffee.  Yes I trained today, just like everyday, twice a day and very hard everyday.  Yes I did my squats and I cleaned up the gym, eat all my food, did my laps in the pool, talked to coach about game plans, kissed my Fiance during lunch time, took my dog on a walk, did some coaching, but now its my time, its time to sneak away to the green jungle.  So hear I am writing to you again about God knows what.  No one in this place knows me, and its great.  I am just an average Joe in hear, free to drink coffee, watch weightlifting videos, chat to old friends from college, and write to you.  How was your day?   How did your training go?  Any Pr's?  I swear you are my best friend, so thanks for hanging out with me. 
     Lets see hear yes I am excited for the Pan Am Games in Mexico, but I have to say I am more excited to watch a movie tonight with my fiance.  Besides hanging out with you and drinking coffee, my favorite thing in the whole wide world is watching a movie on the floor with my fiance and my daughter with four legs.  I saw the best movie I have seen in a long time the other night, you should go rent it tonight!  Its called KILL THE IRISHMAN.  Its based on a true story witch makes it way better.  Its about the legendary Danny Green, the man that took on the mafia, gangs, police and everything that basically messed with him or got in his way.  I don't want to say much more about it, you just need to trust me and watch it.  I hate action movies, sorry I don't know why, and that's why I like this movie, it's a drama with some punch in it.  If you like the Goodfellas, or casino you will love this movie.
       I really do believe that the hot tub is the best thing you can do for recovery.  Before and after, it wakes me up, loosens me up and gets me going.  I have heard all these different run downs about how the hot tub can make you tired....non sense, get out of town with that craziness.
      I will probably start to lose viewers on my blog left and right because most of them are weightlifters and they want to hear the secrete, programing, training story's, technique talk, I am sorry but that would put me asleep, but for the people who like to hear me go on about random life stuff, crazy stories that always seem to come to me, then thank you for staying my friend.
      Didn't get a lot of good feedback form my last blog...hmmm that's weird to me, I thought it was good.  but o well, I will just keep writing away because its my new favorite thing to do.  I would love to start training with other people, I think that's key to training.  I love the people who I train with, not people but my team mates, but I love to mix it up more, anybody want to come train with me?  You can stay at my place it will be fun.  We can hot tub at night, play some poker after dinner, and train all damn day.  I think I am going to become a mute, and only write from hear on out.  No more yelling, and shit talking at meets or in training, just some crazy guy in the corner who is throwing up big weight, then I will get on hear and go crazy.  I think that would be impossible though.  Its funny when people think that what I do in training or in meets is some sort of act, like I am putting on a show.  I find that funny, trust me that's just my crazy self, that's just my emotions getting the better of me, but I really do think that you guys get me, because I know that a lot of people don't.
      My favorite movie is the Truman show, what is yours?  second is AI, third is beautiful mind, fourth is gladiator, fifth is man on fire, six is catch me if you can, seventh is book of eli.
      Does anybody hear drive a Preus?  I am sorry but wtf is that?  I saw how much they are and I almost fell over, why would you spend money on that weirdly shaped car?  O I forgot to save the world and the polo bears, well I guess someone needs to. 
     My roll model is Michael Savage, sorry if you now hate  for those who like him as well than lets have a toast.  When the day gets hard I will slip into my car and crank him up, I guess when he gets his frustrations out I get my out at the same time without saying anything, its perfect.  Now that I listen to Savage everyday, even rush is to soft for me now, ts crazy!  I use to love Hannity, well I still do but that's middle school stuff compared to the Savage nation.  lol I don't know where I am going with this, I guess I am brain washed. 
     Is fast food bad for you?  Will this sport grow more popular?  Will I be able to buy a house next year?  I wonder how hard training is going to be tomorrow.  O I have Kaleb witby coming out tomorrow to train and visit!  Yes, I love this guy, very cool, nice, laid back, and great athlete.  He is staying at my place this weekend, so I can have someone to ramble to about my crazy ideas and beliefs.  Well I think the main reason he is coming out hear is for the Pendlay certification, so I guess I am second on the list.  You probably keep looking at your watch thinking to yourself how much stuff you still have to do today and how much longer is this long, drawn out post going to last, well have a good day, train hard, see you tomorrow.  north 2012

Wednesday, July 27, 2011


     We are an army that leans back to back as we march forward with high knees in the dark and red sky.  Can you picture an army of thousands all moving at the same time?  I can, now let me add some fog in there just to make the picture more intense, more bad ass.  Up a hill with one dead tree, that has been burned from some fire that killed the whole damn village, we march right past as we all start to spread wider and wider taking over anything that gets in our way,  you look this way I  look that way.  When I step you step, when I march you march, when I attack you attack.  If you were a frog and you saw this army stomping your way you would hop, and hop fast.  If you were a straight line Joe you would jump and run,  just like you want to do everyday in your office of blank walls. but you cant because you don't have an army to run with, you are scared, you are a Ferris wheel of boredom.  Weightlifting family we raise our glasses together, and drink our milk around the biggest camp fire in the world, completely protected from the light and dark.  We are not in either, we are the biggest army that know one has ever seen, or knows about.  As the snow falls hard we keep marching as we drag our bars behind us. Rest is for the weak, bar dragging is all we know, pushing on into the red mountains is all we will ever do. 
     Shankle catches his wolf and cuts it's throat while riding on it's back, that wolf is now dead and now we eat.  Kendrick Farris runs fast with his dreads behind him as he jumps and throws his bar 10 football fields long hitting a bear through the eyes, now we eat.  Pat Mendez comes out of his cave reaching 55 feet tall with a fist bigger than the Madison square garden,  pounding the ground creating a crack that swallows a dinosaur whole, now we celebrate.  A quiet and calm veteran named Chad Vaughn that is the deadliest of them all, pulls back his bow and arrow as he lets 1,000 arrows go at one time, flying down and striking every enemy that is even thinking about attacking this cult, family, army, gang, mafia.  We walk tall when we march, we march because we don't have time to stop, we don't want to stop.  When it gets dark coach Pendlay leads the pack as he blows out fire from his mouth,  lighting up the darkness.  He does this is in a way that looks like he is about to explode or "finish" in the snatch, butt back and shoulders over with some very bent arms like a hip cleaner.  Big Phil turns his arms into machine guns and shoots anyone or thing in our way, and I will add a cigar, overalls and a mike Tyson face tattoo in there as well. 
     USA weightlifting, garage lifters, hot shots and small jocks, big gyms or your gym, board shorts or Adidas, slam bars or follow bars, lets keep attacking side by side, lets keep marching, lets keep lifting.
Champ 2012

Monday, July 25, 2011

I Slam Bars

     I wish I could slam other things rather than bars.  I am tired of only slamming bars, there are so many other things I would love to slam.  Maybe the reason why I slam bars is because I imagine slamming other things.  Maybe the hate, sadness, and frustration drive me to slam bars.  I want my father back, I miss my dad.  I wish after I slam the bar glass would shatter everywhere, and the crystals would fly away and never come back.  I wish when I slam the bar that the white powder would be sweeped away by the wind to never be found again.   One day I want to slam a bar so hard that my dad would be released from the hell the devil has put him in.  I wounder if that could ever happen? 

     I wish the bar would take me back to the blue house, the black Lexus, the big offices of Nextel, movie theaters, gas station stops, hotel rooms, soccer games, working out together at Bali's, space Nettle, home videos.  I wish the bar was a time machine. I wish the bar could kill what I wanted it to. I wish the bar would do what I said. I wish the bar was my magic bar.  I wish the bar would bring my dad to see me lift, I think he would be proud of me and what I am doing with my life.  I know he wanted me to get into the business world, the happy hour world, the people world.  But who knows, maybe he would have preferred this lifestyle I live in.  I go back and forth from sad to mad, I have found that it's very hard to control my emotions. 

     I slam the bar with hate, hate towards drugs, hate towards my dad choosing drugs over my mom and I. Hate towards alcohol and what it has don to me, hate towards myself for the person I can sometimes become, hate towards my past and the things I did.  Sometimes I slam bars and I have no idea what I am hateing, but its there in the back of my throat.  My emotions are a roller coaster that has lost all controll, and they take me over like a great dane being walked by a small child.  Maybe if I keep slamming that bar my dad will come watch me lift, or just hang out with me.  I will fucken slam the bar with all the hate and frustration I have in me because that's what makes me feel better, that's what keeps me balanced, and who are you to tell me to stop?  who are you to tell me how to act and live my life?  I get crazy because it takes me out of reality, I don't need drugs to get lost, I have weightlifting, I have this gym.  I cant control my relationship with my dad, but I can control makeing international teams, wining national championships and sometime soon grabbing that American record by the throat and riping its head off.
      I don't care what any body thinks, If you don't like me slamming bars than I will slam you, if you don't like my attitude than screw you, I am tired of looking for approval.  I am tired of asking, waiting in line, putting my hand out and getting no hand to shake back.  I stopped being the sheep, being peoples background noise and view.  I walk away from there group and I will chain the doors to California strength, close the blinds and slam my bars all day and night.  I am a monster, I am not normal, I will hide away in my gym, drink my coffee in the green jungle and be happy.
      Call that glass your son, play catch with it and buy it pop and candy at the gas station.  Have fun with your new family,  I wish you didn't feel the way you do towards me, but I will be just fine.  I have my new family out hear, I have my bar.   -Champ 2012

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

"I Slam Bars"!

Brand new "I Slam Bars" T shirts now for sale at   The shirt is in Navy blue, flex fit, and you have to slam bars to wear this shirt!    -champ

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Green Jungle

I take a giant sip of my ice cold coffee.  Its my third cup this morning and I cant stop, every sip makes me feel better, every sip takes away the stress.  I am drunk off coffee. I sit back and close my eyes as my mind races through old memories, new memories and some thoughts of what the future looks like. coffee is my new best friend,  he understands what I am going through,  he makes me laugh,  smile and most importantly makes me feel good about myself.
      I am not in the gym right now, I am in my hide out, I am in my tree fort.  There are no weights smashing down hard against the floor, and the air is not filled with chalk.  There are many more smiles in my hide away, people are much more relaxed and friendly.  I hide in the corner like the phantom, trying to stay un noticed in this weird world where there are no weights, coaches or athletes.   I drink, I type, and I "people watch".  I find myself staring at these people who don't wear Adidas gear as if they where from another world.  Maybe I am in the other world and they look at me funny,  maybe they think I am the alien.  This green straw keeps looking at me, so I take another sip of the dark liquid that puts me back on track, and I start typing away.  What the hell am I typing for?  What the hell am I writing  about?  Maybe Its my escape from the gym, from the noise and the same old "who's stronger" talk.  I like writing, It feels good to put your thoughts and ideas on paper.  It slows everything down.  The coffee makes everything feel like I am dreaming, like everyone is living there lives and I am just watching.  Who new I would be writing on a blog and lifting weights for the USA.  Some days I just cant figure out how I ended up hear.  It seemed like yesterday I was taking lines off glass tables, and waking up on kitchen floors.  Life is crazy, the different roads it can take you down are beautiful and bazaar.  They can be dark but still fascinating.  I wouldn't change anything I did back then, I don't regret anything I did and got myself into.  There is the world of weightlifting, and there is the world of long nights and car rides to unknown places, but honestly in the end, they are very much the same.  I have touched the hot flame, I have been down the dark ally way, I have seen the devil, and I think I am a better person today because of it.  I thank God and my mom for leading me to the world of weightlifting, wow, who knows what I would be doing right now.
      All I know is that I love this green coffee jungle I am in right now.  I need more coffee, I need more training, I need to get stronger.  I love coaching. My athlete Andrew Jester took bronze at school age nationals, his very first national meet.  I couldn't go with him because of my nationals, but I am very proud of him.  I love that damn kid.  I love everyone in this sport, I love my Fiance, I love this world, I love California strength, I love big Phil, I love all the judges and coaches, even if you don't like me,  I like you.  I love the USA,  I love this coffee.         North 2012  

Sunday, July 3, 2011


That sucks your hands hurt.  O thanks for telling me that I should turn off my AC while the windows are down, let me go ahead and turn off the AC in my car, your totally right man thank you.  O no buddy you have lower back pain when you train?! You should take off three months , your right! the foam roller really helps how you feel in training, OMG I love that stretch, it really works my hamstrings.  I love doing the hang snatch because I really feel like it stretches and strengthens my hamstrings.  Your right bro I would save a lot of money if I didn't buy my smokes, I am done with that man, what was I thinking.  Please tell me what I should do man, please I need help. This life thing is hard, should I turn left or right?  Your right I need to open lighter and make more lifts, yea your right I need to eat better, yea your right I need to control my breathing in competition and focus more on the task at hand.  I am so glad you came up and started talking to me about all this, I am glad you saw the sign around my neck that says help, because I am lost! Shit, dude I am so so sorry that I offended you when I flipped off the camera in one of my you tube videos, that will never happen again, I need to become more classy.  Hey before you leave can you write down everything I should work on or do so I can practice when I get home?  thank you.   I will never joke about steroids again, please forgive me!!!!  "control your temper, stretch more, stop smoking, drive slower, stop spending so much money, you should save up, why a new car you already have one, some people have injury's Jon, so you cant train them that hard, your just young."  -sheep

     -wolf-    I will always drive with my AC on full blast with my windows down.  I will never believe in stretching, and I will always love fast food.  Don't let them change you, do what you want to do, blast your AC anytime you want!  Coach the way you feel is the best way, stop reading weightlifting articles!  stop being brain washed by the "experts"  Windows down and AC up, try it because it feels really good!