College drop out

I miss the “pump”  I miss putting those pads on, I miss going to party’s, I miss my old friends, I even miss college, I miss my family, I miss not lifting.  Hi my name is Jon North and I am a college drop out,  I gave up everything for this sport, I live in a gym, a am a gym.   I am a bar, I am the weights, I am weightlifting.  I went all in with a bad hand, and some how I am still at the final table with the chip lead.  I am putting it on all the line with this sport, I have o excuses, but shit what happens if I fail?  If I fail I have no one to blame, nothing to blame, no excuses, I cant sleep at night.  My mind thinks “what ifs” all day.  I just know that I am so much better than what I am showing right now, I am so damn athletic its crazy, I am not even strong, I just move like a cat, I swear, you should walk in my shoes and see how I float.  I have given everything to be the best, but I need to give more, more and then some more.  Nothing else matters.  If I don't go to the Olympics then what?  who am I?  Whats all this for then?  I waste of life, my life is the Olympics.  I think to grow this sport more people need to just go all in like I did, and hopefully they will go farther than me, hopefully we can win some Olympic medals for this great Country Called the United States Of America baby.  I love this country with all my heart.  Sense I am a pussy and I am not over seas fighting with the rest of our brave soldiers,  than I will fight in the gym and on the platform, that's why when I go to the Pan Am Championships this year I am letting go, I will kill.   Money, college, pressure from others to be something your not, statues, cars, these are all things people want and will choose over there dream, more than half of them will never go for it, they want those things to bad.  The other half gets those things and then still wants to be a bad ass weightlifter, that's the problem.  well lucky for me I have both but don't worry about that…lol   hahaha I am just saying that I wish more weightlifters in this country would man the fuck up and start training for real, and stop with all the other bullshit.  Lets go, lets start training, win or lose we need to keep fighting everyday, find away.  Stop bitching, stop blaming, stop making excuses and make it happen, the way I look at it is Life is a game, play it and win.  North 2012