Kit Kat

The Song I wrote this blog to

What should I write about today?  What should I rant on about today?  Should I write a technique article, or a drink five monsters in a row article?  Should I talk about the second Attitude Nation Certification seminar that is taking place tomorrow, or will I just be beating a dead horse?  Donny is back, yes sir, Donny is back.  Take my hand and jump into my mind for a second. First drink this monster with me, chug with me, cheers with me, then smile and slap hands with me.

He walked into the front door and I jumped with joy.  A memory flashed through my head as I was walking through the gym to meet him half way.  Long strides with a smile on my face, long strides as I looked down at the ground excited to look up for the reunion.  Why do we do that?  Look down when we are walking to something important.  I guess it's the excitement we are to nervous to show others, so we bow our heads keeping our smile below our chin.  A memory about my father flashed through my head, cutting off my smile and slowing my walk down to a complete stand still..  A memory of me sitting cross legged on the floor with my sister watching the X Files flashed into my head like a teacher turning on one of those damn projectors.  Late at night, dark room, with the TV's glow covering my sister and I as if the TV was an alien space ship sucking us into its ship.  A big blue house in the country, a gravel bus stop, horses for miles, old rusty trucks and tractors that lay dead in the tall grass, and the common "mom, Jon is being mean!" line that my sister used quite often. A house full of life and love, a farm full of family and happiness, a time that my sister and I will never forget.  A support group that could take down a pro football team is what we were....well, and still are.  But this night was different, this night was like a dream that sticks with you for the next week or two.  A dream that sits on your back like a monkey from the zoo, hitting you over the head while your wife is trying to take a picture of you.  No mother in sight, not even a clue where should could be.  Lost in the always creepy and weird world of the X Files.  Sister by my side, even though I couldn't see her from the glare of the blazing TV light.  The door behind my sister and I opened, how we knew was simple, the door makes a screaming noise, and I could actually see my dad through the reflection of the TV.  Thank God the show had a dark scene so I could see him, if not the noise alone would have given me that fear of panic...you know, the instant reaction of looking for your mom, especially at that young age.  If you can't find her, well, then I think the next move is just to sit there and start crying. Right? My sisters pony tail hit me in the face from her turning her head so fast.  I then followed, starting to stand up before even getting my head all the way around to see him.  Watching TV too long, or playing a video game too long always gave me a "homesick" feeling.  An uneasy stomachache that put me far from reality. Once my dad walked in, that feeling vanished, the TV had lost me, I was no longer trapped in its bright light.  My sister beat me to him, hugging his right leg while she was somehow still able to jump up and down.  I followed like a sprinter taking second place, still happy, but jealous that he was already giving her the attention first....damn.  I held onto his left leg with my eyes closed, and my two feet standing on his one foot.  When I opened my eyes I saw a Kit Kat bar in my dad's big squishy bear paws, yes!  Kit Kat! Thanks dad!  My sister was even more happy and excited than I was.

Soon after the fighting got worse, and my parents got a divorce; but at that moment everything was perfect.  At that moment nothing else mattered.

I then shook Donny's hand and we began to lift weights.

I still don't know what to write about.  I don't even know what I just wrote.  Maybe tomorrow I will write something worth telling.  Today the Monsters and coffee combined took me down a road that has been grown over by tall grass and weeds.  A road less traveled.  One of those old memories that sticks with us for life, and we have no idea why.  Why that memory?  I am assuming there are many more that has escaped our memory. I guess we must hold on tight to the ones we still have.   

Good night, talk to you tomorrow.  Thanks for reliving a very great childhood memory with me.

I love you, dad.  I hope to someday see you again.   

Salute. Dad 2016