100,000

100,000 Monsters, 100,000 coffees.  100,000 Attitude Nation Soldiers.  100,000 smiles, tears, and laughs.  100,000 epic songs dancing through my soul while writing side by side with Donny as if we were two gladiators fighting in the Colosseum.  100,000 haters trying to defeat the Attitude Nation.  100,000 victories we celebrated. We have raised 100,000 middle fingers high in the air for all to see.  We have 100,000 black suits, playing only one guitar, that never stops playing, even late at night when the drunk crowd tries to boo us off stage.   An army that started at one, one lonely Monster sitting at 7 Eleven in its cold refrigerator, waiting to speak its mind.  One year ago, one iced coffee by the name of Ms. Brown eyes sat hopelessly waiting to be rescued my her knight in shinning armor.  One year ago no one would listen to her, or even knew who Ms. Brown eyes was.  She would try to speak her mind, but would be shunned by the green jungle's dictator.  She would be thrown into her cell only left to cry and wonder, wonder if she would ever have the chance to be free and speak her mind.  She would ponder if she would ever have the chance to make an impact on the world... or who knows, maybe even change it.

Ever since I was a child, I knew I was different.  I knew there was a some sort of expression that was just waiting to be released.  I was constantly muted by my own self insecurities and unsureness of everything, including myself.  I had the thoughts, I had the words, but I was too scared to speak them, write about them, or act on them.  I was too worried about what others thought, that it blinded me from ever seeing the Attitude, the Nation that gives me hope, freedom, and self worth.  Soon I realized that I must not let the audience of life be the judge, I must be the judge.  At the end of the day, I figured out that by writing something good on paper would bring real happiness and a release from my own self judgment.  I would constantly hear the deep pounding drum against my chest, over and over as I walked to its rhythm.  The marching soldiers in my head kept me up all night, and soon made me realize that I wasn't alone.  I knew there were others out there, patiently waiting to attack the world as one well oiled machine.  I just didn't realize there would be 100,000 of them armed and ready.

When the time came one year ago, I knew what I had to do.  I had to start the attack.  I had to release the beast.  I had to bring the Nation together once and for all.  I had to find the missing pieces to my life.  I was a kid that was slowly transforming into what some would call a "grown up", a grown up with interesting images in my head that spoke to me at the oddest times.  I had to write, or I was afraid I would lose it.

After falling in love with Ms. Brown Eyes and adopting Mr. Green Monster, the Nation was almost complete.  I was missing two things, me as a writer, and you as the audience.  I had no idea what kind of words would spill out onto the computer screen.  I spent hours upon hours just staring at the white screen and blinking black line that constantly taunted me to write something, anything!  But it had to be good, it had to come from the heart and it dearly had to mean something.  I was sweating like a pig, and as nervous as a school boy about to kiss a girl for the first time.  We all know in a situating like that you must go for it, and commit fully.  So I did, and as I leaned in to start typing, Ms. Brown Eyes grabbed my hands and starting punching my fingers against the black buttons with such beauty and finesse.  Mr. Green Monster was whispering ideas into my mind, similar to putting your ear to a sea shell.  We were a team, and still are.  I am not even writing this, they are.

Thank you all for your support over the last year.  You all mean the world to me.  This blog would not exist without you.  Thank you for being a part of this team, this family, this creation we call the Attitude Nation.

100,000 and onward 2016